Saturday, 21 July 2012

The allotment afloat

Yes folks it’s another in my occasionally fascinating, yet utterly mind blowing series of “How To.”

How To: Contain & maintain yourself your plants aboard a boat. Research source: Personal experience & exceptionally vivid life skills…

So I’ve gathered a few specimens together to illustrate…

Life in the lux con…

002

Life on the bow…

011

T’other side…

014

A luxury lux con luxury table plant…

013

And I’ve also inherited sole responsibility for Sarah’s plant farm next door while they’ve tootled off round Europe. However, all Sarah’s foliage will remain in situ, most of which is located on the roof of their boat. And it’s going to darn well stay there, (see below). What’s the name of that boat in the background…?

010

And these..

008

Not quite sure about this one…

004

And then there’s these little tinkers, oops, sorry Sarah, looks like one’s been nabbed…

005

So here’s a few helpful tips for healthy foliage:

Keep them well watered… HA! Not difficult recently, till we’re in drought again next week…

020

Converse with them regularly, deep & meaningful conversations work wonders, but be careful not to bore them to death. And let them know who’s boss…

022

Use teabags as compost, preferably used ones, but having not had a brew recently, this is the best I could do…

018

And finally ROOT OUT any detritus, you know, the bits you unintentionally DID bore to death while philosophising…

023

Now I’m sure you’ve learned a lot here, from an expert at giving free advice that nobody knows about everybody knows about anyway…

----------------------------------------------

Well, I’m sat on the bow at the moment, locked out of lux con – no go zone. Marine grade material needs marine grade nutrients now & again. So It’s getting a different kind of treatment to keep it healthy, & it stinks. Dave’s wearing a mask while he wears himself out – must be bad. However, I’ve got a great excuse not to participate, I can’t reach the roof…

0 comments: