DISGUSTING behaviour

Setting the scene: We walked down the towpath into the village last night for a nice relaxing evening at the pub…

Now I’m no prude, but what we witnessed in there was a slobbering, loud mouthed low life putting on a truly perverted performance. I’m guessing his idea was to “impress” his mates, even worse (& slightly intimidating), he must’ve been aged at least 45…

Scene 1: The women’s 10,000 metre race had just started on the TV, the pervert went to it & started putting his finger up & down the screen between the women’s legs as they were running. With bulging eyes & his tongue hanging out he thought it was hilarious, then he looked at me & started nodding his head. In return I gave him “the look” that says “YOU’RE REVOLTING.” On behalf of all women it felt like a violation…

Scene 2: Both myself & another woman were pointed at & described as “she’s fit & so’s that one.” It made me shudder with disgust…

Scene 3: The lady sat at the table next door had also noticed this abhorrent behaviour & while her husband went to the loo, the pervert threw himself at her with hands outstretched aiming for her boobs. She screamed & batted him away, but while he was within earshot, I made sure he heard me say to her “IS THAT A SLIME BALL OR WHAT?” Then I had to ask her if she was ok, because she looked so shocked. When her husband came back, she told him & they walked out…

That was when Dave informed me he needed the loo…! I told him not to worry because if the perv came near me he’d get the heel of my shoe in his balls. (Preferably both heels crushing both balls).

Scene 4: Mr Perv then decided to f*ck the floor, not to be too graphic, imagine a blow up doll underneath. (God forbid it be a real woman). Then his arms gave way, & as he skidded past us in a crumpled roll he belted his back into a chair. After the deafening AGHH, all went quiet, & Heth here chirps up with: “I hope it’s broken.” And that was a tosser toss up as to it being back or dick – preferably both. (Sadly, no justice, it was neither). 

Honestly, to call that sorry excuse of a human being an animal is an insult to all creatures great & small…

There was one slightly comforting thought, Mr Perv was part of a wedding party going on in the marquee outside, & not from round this area…

The not so comforting thought is that even though the staff at the pub were very busy, he should’ve been chucked out. Even his “friends” began shuffling their feet with embarrassment after Scene 3 was over…

Note: I have no personal experience of this kind of behaviour, I just have a talent for being able to read some people like a book. So my diagnosis would be that in real life:

• Mr Perv sat on the “comfort” chair across the desk is a very lonely, desperate, frustrated, individual.
• Just like a child, if he can’t get the attention he craves “the right way,” he’ll get it by behaving naughtily & making a spectacle of himself.
• Mr Perv has a deep disrespect for women, (probably due to his own inadequacies) which makes him a male chauvinist pig. 
• Low self esteem issues mean over-compensation occurs when fuelled with alcohol.
• Anger issues might also go along with it all.

And he must be thick as a plank to think he could impress a woman with his “actions.”

Bloody hell, I’m bordering on feeling sorry for this poor deluded individual now…!

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Even so, we still had a great night, the sideshow happened in the space of about 15 minutes, so we got another drink & sat outside, it was a lovely barmy “balmy” warm evening. That’s when I noticed nb “Free Spirit” (Ian & Irene) were moored up at the back of the pub. But we didn’t like to knock on the side of the boat to say Hello because it was dark by then…

We also bumped into our little pal Kevin who’d come to the pub for a meal with friends, so we had a little catch up like you do. (Hi Kev, was great to see you). Bet you didn’t know about the “individual freestyle speciality act” seeing as you were sat in the dining area…! Besides, we had better things to talk about didn’t we…?

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And a talking point right now is that there’s a spectacular thunderstorm going on here at the moment. It’s so powerful the vibration from the thunder is going through the water AND the boat. Never known that before………